No One Can MAKE Me Angry….Right?

8 12 2007

Even though I work as a counselor, I have to admit that there are some things you will hear from some social workers or counselors (I’ll call them SW/C from here on out) that are complete crap. Their techniques are generally based on research, but let’s be honest people…we are still talking about human beings who make mistakes and say stupid things just like the rest of us. If you come across an SW/C in your life, you do not have to accept everything they say as though it is gospel. One such statement would be, “No one can MAKE you angry; only you can ALLOW yourself to be angry.” Oh really? Yes, we are robots who can completely control our human emotions. Let’s talk about a couple of examples. Your making a quick trip to a grocery store. You park, grab your items (corn on the cob and margarine? Nah, this is hypothetical, so let’s go with whipped cream and strawberries.) You come outside and see an ex-girlfriend keying your car after having spray-painted, “You Suck” on it. Now, remember that expensive counseling you’ve had. “She can’t MAKE you angry.” Yeah, right…I beg to differ. Let’s go with another example any parent can relate to: You’ve just made it back home after your four-year-old has been on your last nerve all day (he threw a fit about his shoes, kicked the dog, and screamed and hit at you while you tried to get him to leave the library in a peaceful and quiet manner). The moment you walk in your house, he makes a move for the kitchen, yanks open the fridge door, and grabs orange juice. You tell him to stop as your carrying in an armload of goodies from the library. Does he stop? No, he unscrews the lid and, while trying to run from you, spills the majority of the sticky stuff all over the kitchen floor. Are you going to get mad? You bet your sweet butt you will.

I tell people I work with that we all have to deal with mean people, obnoxious people, rude people (the list goes on). We will all (beyond our control) get angry from time to time; it’s natural. It’s what we do when we are angry that is either right or wrong. Bottom line, a good counselor or social worker (in my opinion) is one that can provide some common sense guidance and help you to see for yourself what you might want to change about your life. There’s my two cents. Take it for what it’s worth (probably about two cents).

(I will add that if you are the type who gets angry every day or regularly blows up at something small like your cell phone being moved one end table over, you might want to consider talking to an SW/C because you’ve got an issue that is going to negatively affect your life).

Can’t You Smell that Smell?

7 12 2007

Our sense of smell has to be the most underappreciated sense of all. Nothing can transport your mind to another time, place, or even mood faster than a sudden, pleasing scent. With that in mind, here are my top ten:

10. New looseleaf paper just out of the wrapper (at least back when I was in my pre-high school days. I’m not sure if it smells the same now)
9. A vanilla shake
8. Distant leaves burning
7. Popcorn at the movies
6. Crisp morning air in the mountains
5. Cinnabon rolls
4. Chocolate chip cookies baking
3. Someone grilling in the neighborhood
2. My young daughter’s skin and hair when she gives me a hug. (That baby/toddler smell is indescribable, and I’m talking about when they are clean!)
1. The lingering scent of Allison’s skin, perfume, or soap left on one of my shirts.
I’d like to know what others like. Do you have a favorite?