“I Kissed an Earl”

19 08 2008

Like many people, I’ve heard the song I Kissed a Girl, and I’ve seen the NBC show My Name is Earl. Like any normal person, I decided the two should be combined. So I did it – not necessarily well – but I did it.

The following lyrics should be sung to the tune of I Kissed a Girl by Katy Perry, Lukasz Gottwald, Max Martin and Cathy Dennis. I apologize in advance to these writers for butchering your chart-topping song.

Please don’t steal this parody, unless you happen to be Weird Al Yankovic. If you are Weird Al, I’m a big fan and would greatly appreciate you using this song and helping me make millions (or even 10 bucks would be sweet).

For the record, I personally do not remember ever kissing anyone named Earl (male, female or hermaphrodite), although it’s not beyond reason I may have been given a peck on the cheek as an infant by my Uncle Earl.

Anyway, here are the lyrics to I Kissed an Earl:

There is this cool show on TV

It’s really funny

One actress is super hot to me

She’s Jaime Pressly

Won a trip to

The closed set

Just wanted to check her out

It’s not Ms. Pressly I met

Ended up getting thrown out

——————

I kissed an Earl and I liked it

Even though it made me feel sick

I kissed an Earl just to try it

I hope my wife doesn’t like it

It felt so weird

It felt so dumb

I think my lips went all numb

I kissed an Earl and I liked it

I liked it

——————

No I would not repeat this act

Pretend it didn’t happen

Forget he smelled of vanilla extract

Lips are still chappin’

It’s not what

Straight guys do

Not supposed to smooch Jason Lee

And guys don’t

Use the word “smooch”

What’s happened to me!?

——————-

I kissed an Earl and I liked it

Should have been Jaime’s red lips

I kissed an Earl just to try it

Can we just call it a slip?

It felt so off

It felt so strange

Don’t mean I’m totally deranged

I kissed an Earl and I liked it

I liked it.

——————

Us guys we are such homophobes

Football, fast cars, and huge ski slopes

We like when two chicks kiss and stroke

But different – with two dudes

I guess because they don’t have boobies

———————

I kissed an Earl and I liked it

But the world says I must quit

I kissed an Earl just to try it

Put that in your pan and fry it

It felt so wrong

Maybe I’m nuts

Probably shouldn’t have squeezed Earl’s butt

I kissed an Earl and I liked it

I liked it

2008 LicensedtoBlog

2008 Rickety Inflictor Productions

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12 responses

19 08 2008
MrsWaltz

THIS is how good your song is: Although I’ve heard the song, I’ve never seen the show before….and now I’m going to have to watch it. Forget Weird Al, NBC owes you some money for recruiting viewers!

19 08 2008
Luke

Hilarious! And who knows… maybe there will be a recording to follow this.

“We could be the next Weird Al.” – Anonymous uncle of mine

20 08 2008
Tim

That’s just hysterical… I don’t care who ya are.

If Weird Al doesn’t answer the call, perhaps you could talk to Mike Arvin, who’s music video I posted on my blog a couple of weeks ago. – Tim

PS: Any similarity between the used car salesman in that video and someone frequently referred to as “the fool man” is purely coincidental.

21 08 2008
Dead Charming

This, my friend, is comedy GOLD!

Get someone to sing this, make a low-budget video, post it on YouTube, and become an internet sensation!

21 08 2008
What Does Your Music Say About You and Do You Care? « Licensed to Blog

[…] week, I posted my parody lyrics for the song I Kissed a Girl called I Kissed an Earl at the risk of making people who are humor-challenged think I had kissed a man. While I have no beef […]

21 08 2008
Creating Havok 24/7

That’s greatness. I must say, I will never be able to listen to “I Kissed A Girl” again in the same way…..
But, that’s a good thing.

21 08 2008
Unknown

I love it! Hating the “I Kissed a Girl” song myself, I’m glad you did this.

25 08 2008
bluesuit12

Hysterical! “Put that in your pan and fry it” and “Probably shouldn’t have squeezed Earl’s buttocks” have me in tears. Thanks for the laugh!

28 08 2008
romi41

Hahaha….this was so awesome, glad you copyrighted it, and NO guys DON’T say “smooch”, what the hell were you thinking? hahaha… 😉

28 08 2008
Dead Charming

I’ve got about half a dozen people singing this with pretty good regularity, and yes, I’ve attributed the glory to where the glory was due.

I’ve also given you an award at my blog (and this was TOTALLY the clincher, as if you needed one…and now I’ve notified you as “the rules” required).

28 08 2008
Prince Charming is Dead :: And the award goes to…

[…] a TON of great stuff (see his post about a memory book for his kid), but NOTHING will ever top “I Kissed an Earl” in my book.  I find myself singing that at random and inappropriate times, and I’ve gotten […]

29 08 2008
Harfax Johnson Is Born « Hair of the Blog

[…] uncle is ‘Licensed to Blog’ What Does Your Music Say About You and Do You Care?“I Kissed an Earl”Worst Photo Blog EverA Swell(ing) Journey Part X: Good Place, Bad Roommate, “Bad” ResultsSome […]

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